Do Yourself a Favor and Shut Up! Why Talking Too Much in Negotiation Is Never a Good Thing
If you’re planning for a negotiation, you’re probably spending a lot of time thinking about what you should say. You’ll prepare your initial statements and then come up with various things you might say depending on how the other person responds.
In other words, it’s all about you talking.
Do you know that might be the biggest mistake you can make? Talking too much in a negotiation can result in you losing a lot of what you want.
Why? And what can you do instead? Here’s what you need to know.
Why is Talking Too Much a Problem?
You might think that winning a negotiation is all about the arguments you make, but you’d be wrong. The power in negotiation lies in what you know.
That means you need to listen to win. When you listen, you give the other party a chance to share their own priorities — which might be quite different from what you assumed!
When you get the complete picture, you can change your approach accordingly. For example, you might find that the other party is more willing to negotiate a specific point than you expected, and you can use that to your advantage.
If YOU are the one doing all the talking, the other party gets the information — which tips the power scales in their favor.
Let the Other Party Speak First
Once the pleasantries are over, settle in and let the other party speak first. When you set up the meeting, you probably told them what it was about.
If you’re uncomfortable being completely quiet, simply ask, “What do you think of the proposal?” Whether you’re asking for a raise or selling a product, that gives the other person the floor, and they’ll start to share their thoughts.
Maybe they accept without any changes. In that case, you didn’t give up anything you didn’t need to! If they request specific adjustments, you can go from there.
Give Time to Respond After an Offer
During a negotiation, you might make a request or lay out a number. Don’t ramble and talk yourself out of your position. Instead, simply wait quietly and give the other person a chance to think through what you’ve said.
This generally only takes a few seconds. Be patient! When you’ve laid out an important part of your proposal, wait for a response.
You might assume they’re going to be angry or reject your statement, but if you’re silent for a few seconds, you might get the opposite response — which is exactly what you want.
Let the Other Party Talk!
During a negotiation, silence is powerful. You want as much information as you can get, which means being quiet, especially when the other person is talking.
You can even use questions to keep them going if you’re not ready to answer yet, or if they’re talking themselves into a position that’s favorable to you. Don’t forget to use silence strategically at other times, as we mentioned above as well.
In negotiation information is currency. The more you can get from the counter-party the better positioned you will be for success during the negotiation. So ensure you give them time to talk and be sure to never interrupt them.
Take advantage of your power — shut up!
